Conspiracy Room

The first thought I had when I entered the Conspiracy Room was wow, I feel like I'm at Abu Simbel again.Not really.I'm not sure what they're going for decor-wise but I sensed an identity crisis. You had the old movie memorabilia...cool! Really cool! You had ultra modern table/chairs, neon lighting and glass display cases...not so cool. You had the giant statues of Egyptian gods...uh WHAT? (this seemed to be a very 80s decor choice juxtaposed with the carpets and lighting). And then there are the giant pillars all over so that you are afforded only partial viewing of the stage...why? Oh, OK, I get it, they are holding up the damn *foundation* together and all but really...do they need to be *that* huge? The K was certain that they were covering the gorgeous old pillars original to the space (I have dreams, by the way, of destroying modern mending and cover-ups in old buildings. Like in my old apartment, they had covered a fire place with *dry wall* so I wanted to take an ax and go at it...but I didn't.)The bar set up was truly lacking and looked plain awkward, with no mind to design whatsoever. Just a long bar with a few bottles of booze behind it (choices for vodka: absolut and Stoli Raspberry. THAT WAS ALL). 6 bucks. Uh yeah. The show I saw there last week was excellent and yes, I would go back to see another show, despite the fact that the sound was a bit off in the opening number, despite the limited viewing, despite the seating being weird and despite the giant deities that I felt were watching me at every angle. SIGH

I was all set to review this place after attending the ever so lame "Night of Fame 4" - The David Bowie Luau. But now reminiscing on the evening and how the Bowie theme (playing labrinyth on the video screen & his music) went out the window 45 minutes after our arrival, opting for "hipper" music, repetitive video garbage, horrible food, and some ridiculous, retarded antics with humping some blow-up sharks....I'm just to bored to review it. Lame. Lame. Lame.

So since I am a slacker, this memory is about a week old now. Last Thursday I attended J'adore Burlesque's show at the Conspiracy Room in the back of the Uptown Theatre. besides the show being one of the best burlesque shows I have ever seen, the decor of the Conspiracy Room is so badass. I blame my love for it on my childhood dream to be an archeologist. (we all wanted to do that, right?) I have two main complaints about the venue. The seating arrangement was a little awkward. I got there a little late, and sat towards the back, but because of the large support pillars, if you didn't get there at a reasonable time you had to peer around the pillars. So... problem solved: be on time! and don't rely on your friends for a ride when they are known for being late! the second complaint were the drinks. I felt like they were a little overpriced for their toxicity level. haha. I normally drink whiskey and coke, and the six dollar one I paid for there was way more coke than whiskey. I'm sure it would have been fine for my little sister, but not for me. :) Other than that though, I would highly recommend seeing a show here!

First off, let me explain that I was really kind of looking forward to this event. For days. I spent time on the 'Net catching up on Bowie trivia. I wanted to meet the man and compliment him on his performance in The Prestige.Yeaaaaah.... we went to the David Bowie Luau, lightheartedly/halfway expecting THE REAL DAVID BOWIE to be there. As the guest of honor. So much Fail.... [Shudder]Sorry, my shattered expectations are still huddled over there in the corner - wailing " WHYYY... " and sobbing uncontrollably, muttering over and over about never getting that hour and a half of my life back... I'll have to go give them a "there, there" and a cookie in a moment.First off, FALSE ADVERTISING - the event site did *not* say **anything** anywhere about a David Bowie IMPERSONATOR -- it said the 1st 50 people would be " Laid " by **David Bowie.** ( Ok, "laid" translates to " Lei'd " which was understood, but STILL! )http://www.yelp.com/events/photos/TOIH9p13awmc-kNbNvgd-A?selected=Vut48MqYL4SpK6zuEdHKtAI should probably give them another 1/2 star for the Egyptian statues, but I just can't bring myself to care...Anyhow, we arrived fashionably late at 7:30, and there was the Bowie Impersonator at the door. Weak sauce. Nothing against the guy personally, really, but he looked more like Ric Okasec from The Cars than Bowie. ( And for the record, I did wish him a good night when we left. )They had Labyrinth playing silently on the wall, and maybe 1-2 Bowie songs played from the DJ. Okay so far, but the place is REALLY EMPTY...Then it deteriorated...Crappy dance music started up (not even Bowie related), repetitive images replaced the movie, and we were both left thinking, WTF???Honestly, I don't think I saw more than 11 people in the whole place the whole time we were there. Totally, horribly LAME - and embarassing. A SHOT of Bacardi for $6?? In a PLASTIC CUP, not even a bar glass?? Really!? Hell - for that, I might as well stop by Price Chopper and buy a d--n bottle. I kept apologizing to SixFootTwo that this was ***NOT*** what I was expecting. At all.We gave it a decent shot, really, but it Never. Got. Any. Better.Beam me up, Scotty - there's no intelligent life down here...I ended up buying a Polish hot dog + chips 'n soda from the street vendor outside when we left - that ended up being the highlight of the night. He was a cool guy, and a pretty good cook. ( Support the locals, people! )Never planning on going back to this facility -- I can honestly say this was lamer than the train exhibit at Union Station, which makes the David Bowie Luau the Lamest Thing I've Seen in Kansas City.// Not an award you want to "win" :-P

OK, so the set designers from Scarface and the Indiana Jones movies got together and decorated the Conspiracy Room. It could be worse? It could look like the set of the Golden Girls? Or Mama's Family? While not so aesthetically pleasing, it is unique and worth a stopping in for a few drinks and a show or two....or trying out their new Sunday gluten free vegan brunch!! Gluten free and vegan food options are few and far between here in Kansas City, so Uptown/Conspiracy Room's new concept in a welcome addition to our current meager choices. The owner is a fairly recent vegan and gluten free convert who, having experienced some notable health improvements and weight loss after changing his diet, decided to put this brunch together. It's been running about a month now, and while it's already pretty tasty, I have high hopes that it will continue to improve as the cooks get even more familiar with this type of cooking. (So NOT easy!)I've stopped in twice now for brunch, and can honestly say that it's been an enjoyable eating experience each time. I'm not a foodie though, I have to admit. I'm not a picky eater either. Food is food and I'm always glad to have it. And my food consumption situation is a bit different from most people's, having eaten a strictly (almost) gluten free, dairy free, bland diet for about a year. Seriously, the brunch seemed like a feast to me! There are plenty of pasta options, a few vegetable dishes, a small salad bar, and soup, besides dessert. Alternative grain options, like quinoa and rice were incorporated into the menu, and today, they had blueberry pancakes made with what tasted like corn. Darn good.(Alright, they were slightly dry, but nothing some organic maple syrup didn't fix.) They even ran out of pancakes at one point, so that proves they were enjoyed en masse. I went back twice for biscuits and gravy. It was sooo amazing to eat biscuits again. It's seemed like an eternity since I last had a freakin' biscuit. They didn't taste quite like a typical greasy biscuit, but they were fluffy and doughy and they made me super happy, so that was more than enough for me. Last week they had oatmeal cookies. I ate a plateful. Yes, there is a pattern here. I become a carbaholic when I can. Additionally, each week features a health-talk by a locals involved in the alternative health-care industry. The last two were an MD and a DC. Based on my two visits, there was quite a lot of audience participation throughout the talks. Such an excellent way for people to swap and compare their stories, and it promotes some much needed solidarity to those who suffer in their gluten free worlds. As a side note, brunch features live music. Not a big fan of this, but only because I like to talk, and my voice never seems to carry over Bob Dylan covers and flamenco love songs. FYI: Kids are welcome, even encouraged. It would be a great way to introduce them to healthier food options.One more thing: You will soon be able to order and pick up organic groceries here. Awesome, right?My final thoughts: You should try this brunch at least once, just to say you did. If you are totally into greasy food dripping in butter, this isn't the place for you, but it can't hurt to try it. It's better for your body, and you might discover that gluten free vegan doesn't have to taste like cardboard. And how cool is it that things like this are happening in KC? This place has some hope after-all!!

This room has a long bar and is quite large. It's part of the building of the Uptown (all one owner). It was a bit hard to find as they had the door locked and closed when I got there. They put out a sign later.They hosted a vegan buffet on weekends here. It's quite a large venue, which allowed them to show the movie "forks over knives" while we ate and chatted. The venue is old and outdated, but I suppose that is half the charm.At the bar, they had a small TV. The prepared a fresh juice bar (kale, carrot, lemon, etc.), which was really tasty. They also had organic vodka, which I was unimpressed with. The coffee was pretty gross. For the buffet, they had couscous, rice, stir fry, blueberry pancakes, and good sauces. I think this was the first time I had seen real maple syrup in a restaurant city since moving to Kansas City 3 years ago. The cookies were a bit bland.The staff was quite friendly and talkative as were the patrons (who showed up at the latter half of the buffet). I showed up when they opened and it was a good hour before ANYONE showed up. Really weird :( This was a meet-up event, but everyone showed up in groups, which made it a bit awkward to mingle, but I had fun anyhow.There was one staff member who was a recent convert to vegan-ism who was a bit kooky and really turned me off, but I suppose all to their own. He sure had a LOT of conspiracy theories which fit right into the venue.I haven't seen any more vegan buffet options since this event and suppose it's due to the poor showing. Personally, the amount they charged for the types of foods they were serving didn't add up in my book. They could have prepared smaller quantities and tastier options for less price, but what do I know? Isn't a buffet the antithesis of healthy eating (which they are promoting)? So sad, as I could eat everything there (I'm lactose intolerant) and it was all organic.